To spill, or not to spill?

You know, there are so many things that people never mention about pregnancy and kids. Never. I'm not sure if it's because they get pushed in to the background by more important things, or if no one wants to be the one to spill the bad news. Because I'm sure if I had known some of these things, I wouldn't have been so eager to give up being the only one in my skin. Know what I mean? Like, at the beginning of the pregnancy (at least, the first one. I'll let you know if it holds true for the other ones) I felt as if I was being blown up. Like, as if I had a balloon pushing from the inside out. There was, but I didn't expect it too feel so intense. But it only was like that before things started popping out. Once my skin stretched and my belly popped, I was good. But it was so bad, that I was feeling clausterphobic. And I like being wrapped tightly in the covers, I like having an undershirt tighter than my outer clothes. But this, this was different, and uncomfortable.

Another thing, your baby belly may go away and slim down, but that extra skin, the part that stretched so you can have a cute baby belly? That's still there. It may not be noticable under the clothes, but look closely, you can see the wrinkly stretchy skin, similar to a balloon that's been deflated. *looks around* Did I just say that out loud...can you forget that's me, and imagine I'm slim, trim, and in shape? Great.

Enough about me. Now, the baby. Those emails "Is Your Baby's Development On Track?" They're all lies. My kid isn't dumb, by any stretch of the imagination (no it's not the parent pride, promise :D). He's not pointing at things he wants. He's not saying things he wants, "bottle" "juice," nope. Every once in a while he'll squeeze out "dad" or "mama," but there's no reason or predictability to it. He's even said "shoe" once, out of the blue. Yes, he knows what I'm saying when I ask him, "do you want to go outside?" so, he's not, not understanding. He's just taking his own sweet time.

Once he hit 11 months, my great eater morphed into the great food pusher-outer. Green beans, peas, basically all those healthy foods that he loved, he now refused to eat, unless they're baby food consistancy (you can bet I still take advantage of that!). He'll eat hot dogs, mac'n'cheese, anything from my plate that I don't want to share, any snack food.

What else...oh, yeah. Sweet baby breath has changed to the worse toxic morning breath ever. I even brush his teeth for a super long time before putting him to bed. He doesn't eat during the night any more, so that's not it. I'm thinking until he gets to use floride tooth paste, we'll have to battle it with frequent brushings.

I know there's more, I hit my head on things each day that I wish someone had told me. I'd even take mentioned then run the oposite direction at 55 mph!

Take what I've been emboldend to say and go forth and conquor. I think first time parents are so blind and young and stupid. I really do. No matter how "prepared" you think you are, the second child is always better. He's always welcomed with more knowledge and more smooth sailing (at least, theoretically) that the first. I know ours will. Some people...I think they'll always been up-tight and neurotic

That's just their personality. I tried to be type A concerning Brendon and things like germs, and clothes, and cleaning and the stuff that all first-time parents are supposed to be. But I failed, epically. The only time I boiled his pacifiers/bottles was when I first bought them before he was born, and a few weeks ago when he had that virus. *sheepish grin* He eats things off the floor all the time, but I do make sure I get it out of his mouth before he swallows it. WIN!

The one thing that's been hard to relax about it getting dirty/messy with food or dirt. I have to refrain myself from wiping his face after each bite. I cringe when he crawls into the dirt with his clothes on...well...even if he doesn't have clothes on, I cringe. I curl up and die each time I see him eating or playing with the dirt.

I'm sure any subsequent kids will be the same. I use the same towel for a few weeks -it's drying off a clean body, so where's the dirt?? I rewear a shirt or pants if I didn't do anything but lounge around the house. Why would I change things around for Brendon. We aren't unsanitary, but neither are we neurotic.

I probably scared you all from ever visiting my house, ever!, but that means I won't have to clean my toilets! WIN!